Ask the Traws!

Do you need some advice about:

  • Life
  • Love
  • Career
  • Sex
  • Ass
  • Booty
  • Getting Laid
  • Finances
  • Family
  • Vacation Ideas
  • Stress
  • Fantasy Sports
  • Real Sports General Management
  • What to Watch on TV
  • Should You Get That Rash Looked At
  • Anything you could ever imagine ever in your wildest dreams!

Well, you’ve come to the right place. Mattraw and Shatraw are known for their sage, frank and oftentimes HILARIOUS advice. Want to know the perfect way to woo your crush? We’ve got the strategies that will make his or her heart melt. Trying to gain some ground in your fantasy baseball league? Screw Sportsline; now you’re in the right place. Want to know how to make six figures in the comfort of your own home? We have no idea, but we are all ears.

Email your questions to TheTrawBros@gmail.com and please include your (fake) name and location. Then look for your answers right here, at TrawTopia.

8 Responses to “Ask the Traws!”

  1. Saint Dynamite Says:

    Dear Traws,

    If you could cast the new Justice Legue America movie, which actors would you choose?

    Love,
    Saint Dynamite

  2. shatraw Says:

    Saint Dynamite,

    You’re question has been noted and shall be answered this week.

    I’ll tell you one thing: Hugo Weaving plays the Martian Manhunter.

    Any requests on the villain? Because, frankly, I have no idea against whom the JLA battles.

    Solomon Grundy???

  3. fun=fun Says:

    shatra, i hate to be a needlebug, but you misused “your” and “you’re.” don’t be like eick. and don’t feel bad, precious sportscenter misused “affected” and “effected” and they’re already on tv.

  4. shatraw Says:

    shatraw the commenter is allowd typeos.

  5. George Washington Says:

    Dear Traws,

    Has this ever happened to you?

    http://youtube.com/watch?v=5D6nETEEg0A

  6. gilgamesh Says:

    Dear Traws,
    I have a friend with a lot of problems. Let’s call this friend On Jeick. On Jeick is an upstanding citizen, a solid tax-paying button-down shirt-wearing guy with dark secrets. My friends just visited him and On Jeick subjected them to the following perversions:

    -the crabbler
    -the beastly frother
    -the bumbling junker
    -the stinkfist

    My question is this: What’s the best way to stop this immoral carnage? I’ve thought about murder, but I’m afraid his ghost will avenge his death.

    Keep up the good Trawing!

  7. gilgamesh3009 Says:

    Dear Traws,
    Who’s “Now?”

  8. mattraw Says:

    Dear Gilgamesh,

    You’re so now and you don’t even know it!

    Love,

    TrawEast

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